Johannes Laitila: Brainbird


I do have a feeling that you're locked up in my head. I cannot close my eyes but I have to stay in bed.

One day I'm going to mix a drink of all the tears I've shed. Then I'm going to swallow it and hope that I'll forget.

I'm looking at the distance, I see buildings rising high. Sometimes I have a dream you'd be able to fly. I would see you float free, I would never cry. But then I'm thrown back to the start so it's a whisper, it's a sigh.

Streets are getting empty but I'm still folding the map. I'm trying to find my way out so that I could relax. But as long as I'm not able to find where I'm at, there would simply be no chance of getting back.

The town's buried in snow, I don't see any people 'round. I'm afraid my fingers freeze if I tried to write it down. All the flowers that I had on my windowsill were dead by the time I came back and now I feel ill.

Restlessness and longing and elusiveness of love. Every day I'm more absent. I feel ambivalent.

You'll never escape my head although you wish, although you want. You'll never escape my head, I know you wish, I know you want.

Rain falls through the ceiling, it drags me to the floor. I'm afraid that someone could walk in the door.

I do have some secrets, I have told you some. I do have some secrets but I feel that you have none.

Still I don't if anything could let you out. I have a painful headache, it makes me want to shout. It's your heart beating in my head, I stay awake at night. You keep crashing on the walls. You can't fly. You can't hide.

Restlessness and longing and elusiveness of love. Every day I'm more absent. I feel ambivalent.

You'll never escape my head although you wish, although you want. You'll never escape my head, I know you wish, I know you want.

I would like to close my eyes, I would love to fall asleep. But I just had no idea that this valley was this deep.

You'll never escape my head.
You'll never escape my head.
You'll never escape my head.
You'll never escape my head.